No matter how hard I try – I cannot be neat and organized! I feel like it’s just something inside of me that rejects it. I’m married to a man who spends countless hours cleaning and organizing the garage…yep, THE GARAGE! But I can’t seem to even keep the kitchen clean. I do feel better when the house is clean. I love when I walk into everything being put up. I love doing my hair and makeup, but that too seems to be a struggle. Putting effort into things I don’t find enjoyment in is a real struggle for me. I love the after effect but the during just seems to tedious and overwhelming sometimes.
On top of this usual issue I’ve had my whole life, I was told last night that while my daughter’s class was reading a book about a bear who was a grump she decided to inform the entire class that’s just like her mom. What?!?! She is the one person I try my hardest to be gentle and kind to. So I asked, what would make me not be a grump. She responded, “If you would just tell me I’m hurting your feelings when I make a bad choice instead of yelling.” Then this morning my devotional was about parenting/disciplining out of love instead of anger. So now I’m on a mission, a complete life revamp.
Three days ago I started a version of the Whole 30 diet. I refuse to give up ALL things I love so I gave up most things and I’m allowing myself small things like a tall caramel latte instead of a grande, one piece of bread every few days instead of 10 pieces a day, one small treat at the end of the day instead of snacking on candy all day long. It really hasn’t been as much of a struggle as I thought it would be because I’m already feeling so much better. I also started working out again – running, yoga, lifting weights. And just three days in I feel like a slight version of my old self instead of the out of shape, run down, stressed and tired version I have been the last year. My hope is to have more energy, sleep better AND be less of a grump!
Do as I say, not as I do will not be the example I set in my home. One step turns into five, turns into 500. I was reading a blog about the Whole 30 diet and the author said, “Make sure you know your why, and it can’t have anything to do with weight.” That stuck with me, because at first it was just about weight. But when I truly thought about my why I realized it had so much more to do with how I was feeling about myself, my relationships, my sleep, my mood. I want to be a positive example for my child. I want to make a difference in the lives of others. And that has nothing to do with my weight and everything to do with my attitude. What’s your why?
Mama Vibes ✌️ 